(no subject)

[last_adam]

It's not that Adam and Alanna didn't kiss and make up. (They did that several times over.) It's not that things were uncomfortable, or that they didn't go back to being ridiculously happy, because they did.

It's simply that sometimes things take a while to go back to normal.

And so Adam's smile is honest, but smaller, as he looks up at Alanna over the book he's reading (a tome on bookbinding, from the libraries at Olau, actually) and he shifts to make room for her on the sofa.

Comments

[the_lioness]

For one thing, Alanna still feels a bit foolish, if only for yelling at Adam the way she did. Her feelings haven't changed, simply... cooled off a bit with the benefit of additional information.

Sitting beside him, she returns his smile, a little anxious, and tries to catch a glimpse of the title.

"What are you reading?"

[last_adam]

"One of Miles' old books."

He turns it so that she can see it.

"Just a bit on bookbinding in Tortall."



Well, it's not as if he can use his Earth machinery and tools there, not without looking highly suspicious.

[the_lioness]

Running her finger down the leather spine, Alanna looks up with a smile that's as comfortable as its predecessor was anxious.

"I thought it might be from home. I like watching you."

Her hand falls back to her lap.

"When you work with the books," she clarifies, laughing quietly. "Not that I don't enjoy watching you all the time."

[last_adam]

He looks a little surprised at that, but pleased.


"It can't be as nice as watching you train."

[the_lioness]

There's something almost shy about the way she bites her lip and colors slightly.

"I'm certain it must be," she insists. "All I do is get hot and sweaty. It's the way your hands move -- confident, but always careful -- and the unguarded look in your eyes. Most people don't get to see that."

Alanna rather likes it that way.

[last_adam]

Adam bites his lip, matching her own mark on his lip, and he slips the book shut with an almost shy shrug.

"I could say the same of you. Though the hot and sweaty is usually a bonus."

[the_lioness]

"Is it? Can't imagine why."

Smiling absently, she takes the book from him and sets it aside, then looks as if she's not sure what to do with her hands.

[last_adam]

Adam isn't sure, either, and he shifts a little nervously before reaching out and placing one of his hands on top of her folded hands. He doesn't say anything, but tugs on them lightly, pulling her towards him.

[the_lioness]

Exhaling slowly, she moves closer and watches her own fingers tangle with his, her other hand covering both of theirs.

"I really didn't mean to lose my temper that way," Alanna blurts out. "If I hadn't already been so irrationally upset..."

She shrugs.

[last_adam]

He wraps his arms around her, trying to get her to lean against his chest.


"I know."


The words are soft, and unsure.

[the_lioness]

She doesn't yet, wanting to watch his eyes.

"You had a point," she concedes. "It's just that I've been trained to look at such things one way, and one way only. Sometimes I forget that others haven't, and given where my mind was, it threw me when you disagreed."

To put it mildly. Alanna smiles sheepishly and gives in, resting her head on his chest so she can hear his heartbeat.

[last_adam]

Adam nods, pulling a hand up to run over her hair.

"You realize I wasn't talking about the actions themselves, right?"

[the_lioness]

"I do now. And, if I'm honest, I did then. I was just too blinded by upset to admit as much. It seemed like you were taking her side over mine, and it felt so similar to all those months when I was the only one who thought ill of Roger. I realize this is ridiculous, but I wasn't exactly thinking rationally."

As she speaks, she closes her eyes and unconsciously moves closer to his hand.

[last_adam]

Ah.




He kisses her head and keeps stroking her hair, softly, so soft.


"Elizabeth is not Roger."

[the_lioness]

"No," Alanna sighs softly.

She's still alive, for one thing.

"I know. Raven, I think, said it best. She's young and stupid, but these aren't exactly crimes. I don't agree with what she did, nor do I like her, but I'll leave it there."

Lifting her head, she searches his eyes and kisses him lightly.

"And I won't object if you want to spend time with her."

[last_adam]

There's a soft chuckle and her head bounces against his chest.


"I don't quite think we'll be fast friends."

[the_lioness]

It's probably a good thing that he can't see the satisfied look in her eyes.

"With her attitude, I'd be surprised if she has any friends at all."

She bites her lip again.

Hastily, "I am happy, however, that you and Jack seem to have found a middle ground."

[last_adam]

"He's better when he's not knocking me on my rear."


It's what he says, but there's a kindness and a laughter under it.

[the_lioness]

Alanna can't help but giggle, and lifts to kiss him again.

"I gave him rather a hard time over that."

[last_adam]

"Did you?"

There's so much Adam didn't ask about last summer, about that and them. And he's not sure he wants to, but he can't quite help it.

[the_lioness]

"I did," she replies quietly, trailing her fingers across his chest. "If I hadn't been choking on my pride, I would have broken free and come back. As it was, I missed you terribly."

Part of her wants him to ask -- the same part that wants to ask him about the others.

[last_adam]

"I missed you, too."


As if it hadn't been horribly obvious, as if it's still not horribly obvious.

[the_lioness]

"It was only my pride, you know. And yours. I wanted to be with you, but then there was... her, and I knew if I didn't do something, anything to make that feeling go away, you'd know how truly jealous I was. I didn't want you to feel sorry for me."

She smiles ruefully.

"I lost a dare because of you."

[last_adam]

"But I didn't feel sorry for you at al-




a dare?"

[the_lioness]

She shakes her head.

"I was worried you would if you knew how much I wanted you. Because I didn't think you wanted me back."

Shifty eyed, she nods.

"I bet one of the crewmembers that I could climb to the top of the rigging," she explains. "Halfway up, I started thinking about everything, and you, and got a little dizzy. It just didn't seem to matter because I couldn't tell you about it afterwards. So I climbed back down, and had to teach the crew a song. Dreadfully embarrassing."