(no subject)

[last_adam]

*The door opens quickly and cleanly, shutting just as quickly behind them as Adam and Alanna stumble into the room. There's only just enough light to see by, and they make their way wearily to the bed. With all of his nerves, Adam had far more Atlantean to drink than he should have, and he keeps finding himself laughing. A quiet, nervous laugh, and he can't quite stop, for fear that it would become something else.*

Comments

[the_lioness]

*Alanna listens, turning to watch him ever few moments as she hunts through the closet for a nightshirt. Still a bit uncertain, she retreats to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth, taking a moment to stare at her reflection in the mirror.

Sighing, she looks away.

Brush in hand, she returns and sits down on the side of the bed, just looking at the wall.*

[last_adam]

*Adam watches her back, unable to bring himself to ask her to turn around. A hand on her waist, though, and he's no longer laughing.*

[the_lioness]

*Her fingers twist in the nightshirt she had forgotten to put on, and she whispers.*

It is hard to look at my own reflection and keep acting like everything is alright.

[last_adam]

*Adam nods. He won't say that everything won't be alright, he can't bring himself to say that to her. But he doesn't echo the lie they've been telling each other for days. Instead, he comes from behind and wraps his arms around her.*

[the_lioness]

*Swallowing, Alanna leans back, not quite able to look at him yet. If she does, those tears she has been holding back for days will get the better of her.*

I just... I see him, and I wonder if he thinks about me at all, and I can't help but miss him.

Even if... I know... I just do.

[last_adam]

*His arms squeeze her tighter, as he tries to put his words into his motions.*

[the_lioness]

It's just so hard to believe after everything we've been through, and he's my...

*All she has to do is think the word 'family' and a few tears escape. Squeezing her eyes shut, she bites her lip hard.*

How do you get over being absolutely certain you would die to protect someone only to find out that they, in turn, would send you to your death of their own volition?

I don't understand.

I told myself the first time... that he'd done me a favor. That he gave me a chance to prove that Roger was rotten, and I didn't act impulsively by killing him.

I can't explain this away.

[last_adam]

*Adam turns her face towards his, and uses a finger to wipe the tears away, following it with a kiss.*

I'm sorry. I wish-

*What, that Thom wasn't a self-centered ass? That Roger would just die and stay dead? That he could steal her away and keep her safe and happy forever?*

I'm sorry.

[the_lioness]

*Alanna half turns and takes a shuddering breath, closing her eyes in an attempt to pull herself together. She kisses him softly, tasting the salt of her own tears, and shakes her head.*

No. None of this is your fault, so do not say that, please. I can not even imagine what any of this would be like without you. Don't want to.

*She tenses a bit, her fingers gripping his shoulder, then sits back enough to look up at him.*

I'm sorry.

[last_adam]

*His eyes are deep and sad as he looks at her.*

Wasn't going to leave you all alone.

[the_lioness]

*Despite herself, she smiles. It's small and sweet, and she traces the angles of his face with her free hand.*

And I thank you for it, because despite my stubbornness and insisting that I don't need anyone... I do.

Look at that. I said it.

Love you, Adam.

*She kisses him again, eventually reaching up and pulling the brush through her tangled hair.*

We've looked everywhere I can think of to look. I think... it's time I tell Indy.

[last_adam]

I love you, too.

*He sways a little uneasily.*

You'll be careful?

*Talking to Indy, after, it's not really clear which he means.*

[the_lioness]

Always. Don't worry.

*It's a reflexive response. She lifts the ends of her hair and combs through the worst of the tangles before tossing the brush aside. Once her shoes are kicked off, she crawls up on her knees and faces him, lifting his hands and resting them at her waist.*

Are you alright? I don't think I've ever seen you drink that much.

[last_adam]

Always worry.

*He nods seriously.*

Drinks weren't, had to make it other.

*He stares intently at his thumb as he rubs circles with it on her hip.*

[the_lioness]

Other?

*Her eyes follow his for a moment before returning to his face.*

Oh. Atlantean? I wondered. *She smiles softly, rubbing his back.*

[last_adam]

Mmm, atlantean.

*He nods, and looks around, as if expecting to find a bottle on the bedside table.*

[the_lioness]

Mmmm, perhaps you've had enough? *Her fingers grip his waist as she thinks.* It wasn't just Lilly, was it? Mithros...

*She sighs. He knows she is sorry, so she doesn't repeat herself, just hugs him.*

We will find Indy and find the box. Tomorrow.

*That was a very deliberate 'we.'*

[last_adam]

*He wants to yell. He wants to shout and throw things and rage. But even through his liquor-enduced stupor, he figures that's a bad idea. Instead, he lays his head on the pillow.*

How?

*It's not that he doesn't trust her. It's not that he doesn't have faith in her. It's simply that he's been working the problem over and over and over in his head since she's told him, and has yet to be able to find a way.*

[the_lioness]

He finds things, and so do I. Together we will find it, and Roger will be checked.

*She blinks. It's as good an explanation as any, and certainly better than it's our last chance. Eyes bright, she studies his face.*

What are you... don't hold back, Adam. Talk to me. It's alright.

[last_adam]

*Adam laughs that same, strange, off-kilter laugh.*

You're one to talk.

*And curls up.*

[the_lioness]

*Alanna stretches out beside him and stares blankly at the ceiling. She doesn't move away, but she senses that touching him might not be the best idea right now.*

Perhaps. Perhaps not. I do realize my mistake now, however. And I've not repeated it.

*Unless you count internalizing things about Thom, but that's more an unconscious self defense mechanism than anything else. She really does not realize how much she is holding in there.*

[last_adam]

*Adam lays next to her, every muscle in his body tense. He tries to force himself to take deep breathes, to try and calm down, all the while his mind is raging. If it had been some stranger, some other person, it would be easier. To hate.

To hurt.

But it was Thom, and she loved him - she loves him, and trusted him and-

His knuckles are white with the strain.*

[the_lioness]

*Her eyes well up again, and she bites her lip. She notices his tension - she'd have to be unconscious not to- and worries at its cause. Reaching down, she rests her hand on one of his, still staring at the ceiling.

She has no idea what to say.*

[last_adam]

*He looks down at her, his eyes filled with confusion. fear. anger.*

He


was


your


brother.

[the_lioness]

*Alanna flinches just before her face turns impassive, purposefully so.*

Is.










No amount of betrayal will change that.

*It's the first time she has really allowed herself to use that word, and suddenly she can't stop thinking it. Betrayed, betrayed, betrayed... Her breathing goes unsteady.*